Lingualogue Blog

Here is my list of 10 extremely feeble excuses for people choosing not to learn a language. It is amazing how people will use at least one (sometimes several) of these to convince themselves that they cannot or do not wish to learn a language.

So in no particular order — the 10.

1) I am not interested in languages
Fair enough you may say, but if you asked this same person would he like to know a new language for free with no effort involved,what are the chances he would say no? Slim? Who wouldn’t like to see himself using a foreign language to order dinner while on holiday?

2) Everybody Speaks English
This is not only the most annoying, but also the most embarrassingly conceited excuse. It is also, sadly,  one of the most common. Yes many people speak English, and yes it is the Lingua Franca of global business, but for how long? Chinese, Arabic and Spanish are very widely spoken languages, and it is an extremely arrogant attitude to presume that everyone should learn English to communicate. In Asia, Mandarin Chinese is becoming a very important language for business.
Thankfully, most people who use this excuse, also think that the hamburger is fine cuisine, and New Zealand is the capital of Australia.

3) I tried before but I gave up
This is understandable. many language courses are as dry as the paper on which they are written. Some methods of teaching foreign languages are just plain boring, you need to find one that suits your learning style and is fun. There is also a need to have an interest in the language you are learning or what you are doing with it–Join social networks. This will not only help you learn a language but also let you meet new people. Make some friends, flirt a little, whatever you want to do to make the language come alive.

4) I can’t afford it
This used to be a good excuse back in the day. Back when classroom study was the norm and the only self study courses consisted of stacks of books and cassette tapes. This, thankfully, is no longer the case. You probably already have an mp3 player and a computer with an internet connection; these are all you really need to learn a language these days. There is more than enough free stuff around to keep you from saying “I can’t afford it” ever again.

5) I don’t have the time
Understandable. It’s a fast-paced world we live in today and many people find it difficult to create enough time to have a relationship let alone learn a language. It need not be all that time consuming though–30 minutes per day is all you need to find, and with personal mp3 players it does not even need to be in one sitting. A little while you wait for the elevator, a little more while you are ordering lunch, not to mention that brief burst while waiting in traffic. You may not have time for a relationship, but you have no excuses to not squeeze in a language.

6) I am too old
Many people still believe that only children can learn languages and that once you reach a certain age, your brain is as useful as an old shoe. This is of course nonsense. Not only can adults learn new languages perfectly well, the studying of a new language can exercise your brain to stave off that ‘old shoe’ day by a few more years. Basically it doesn’t matter how old you are; you are never to old to learn a language.

7) I am not good at languages
Some people are better at others at learning languages, this is life. Some men are better with the ladies than others, but most men will get married. Not being a naturally gifted linguist does not mean you can not learn a language. Almost everybody in Denmark and Sweden can speak English as a second language and I guarantee they are not all gifted language learners. As a wise man once said, when it comes to languages it is ‘attitude not aptitude’ that will help you learn.

8 ) I do not have the self discipline to learn alone
Then get a partner to learn with. Get a tutor. Join a social network and make friends to learn with who will push you as you go along. Set yourself goals as you learn. Create competition. Basically do anything that will engage you, keep you interested and keep your motivation for learning the language as strong as when you started.

9) I will never get to use it
Okay so you live in a small town where everyone really does speak English and foreign languages are relegated to use on unpopular food wrappers. With whom  or where in the world could you use this foreign language once you learned it? Well there maybe nothing in your town that offers opportunity, and maybe your town is as far as your opportunities and horizons extended…before. Once you learn a language, your outlook on life explodes. Once you have learned a language, you will be looking for excuses to travel, to go on holiday, to use the language. You will take trips into the city to visit restaurants so you can practice your new  tongue; you will make new exotic friends online and maybe even start new relationships. It will be a new adventurous you;  you may even start watching foreign films (okay let’s not push it too far). The point is, although you may have no opportunities to use a foreign language now, after you learn it the opportunities will present themselves and change your life

10) I have no excuses
This one is here both because I could only think of 9 excuses and this seemed a silly number for a list, but also because it is true. You literally have no excuses for not learning a language. I hope now that you have read the 9 poor excuses for excuses above, you realize that the excuse you used to have is no longer there. Get out there and learn a language. Good luck and happy learning.

A new study from Israel claims that the best way to detect if someone is lying or not is to check their handwriting. Forget the old polygraph, or the infamously ineffective sodium pentathol shot, now all you need is to look at their handwriting. The basic idea is that by the time we are adults our handwriting is fixed– hardwired if you will into an automatic action. When people lie, however, the extra cognitive effort that goes into pulling out an enormous whopper of a porky means the writer tends to unintentionally hesitate and press harder on each pen stroke. This is imperceptible to the naked eye but is detectable to specially programmed computers.

As cool as this sounds I have a couple of issues with the science: The sample was pretty small (only 34 people) to begin with, and the volunteers were only asked to write either true or untrue stories to check the system. I would be interested to see if for the “liars”   there is a difference between people who are ostensibly writing fiction (and whose brains would therefore be forced to stop and think), and people who are lying (and could have planned their lie well in advance). My point is, many people who are gifted liars, plan their lies in advance and almost believe the lies they say themselves. Therefore I would be a little skeptical as to how much extra time their brains would need to process the lie.

I would certainly be interested in seeing more research on this though.

One more thing– how many people actually use handwriting these days anyway?  Maybe they can devise a liars typing test

The full article is at Mmegi

I really wish I could take credit for the following list, but sadly I cannot.  It is a wonderfully funny list of what to do, and more appropriately what not do, when writing in English. It is not just funny though, it is also very clever and actually useful, although I am not sure if people who do not know the rules/terms already will understand either the humour or the usefulness.

Here are the 33 rules for better writing -  if there are any that you do not get, you should look them up immediately as this is a great way to see each rule in a self broken context.

1. Verbs HAS to agree with their subjects.

33. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement

This list has been taken from the Humor Matters website which includes many more language related funnies than this and is definitely worth checking out.

Just a quick bit of news that has recently skimmed my desk – Pimsleur Languages have released the third installment of their Eastern Arabic course. Arabic is an extremely useful and worthwhile language to learn, and many Americans are recognising its importance in the world today and opting to learn it.

The Eastern Arabic language is a regional dialect of the language found in the  eastern Mediterranean  (or Levant) region of the middle east, which includes Syria, Lebanon, Jordan ,and Palestine.  Arguably the most widespread Arabic dialect, it allows the speaker to communicate with the majority of Arabic speakers.

Pimsleur Languages eastern Arabic III – good news for anyone looking to learn this language.

This is a clip I found of an audition for ‘Music Idol’ which I guess is yet another reality ‘talent’ contest to go along with ‘celebrity tap dance’ and ‘American geriatric breakdancers ‘. The clip is a fair demonstration of the importance of learning the pronunciation of your target language–especially if you intend to embarrass yourself in front of several million people.

I know I shouldn’t really laugh, as I understand the difficulty and frustration of trying to speak a foreign language and sounding completely unintelligible. Then again, I tend to limit my embarrassment to one or two carefully chosen squid vendors  and not vent my inadequacies on national TV.  Fair game to the girl for giving it a go though. A lot braver than me I can tell you that.

I must admit I allowed myself a guilty chuckle though. Hence the post.

I found a fantastic article that I just had to share on here about the importance of learning to use language properly. The article was actually in reply  to a question posed by a reader on a careers  site dedicated to helping people find jobs. The article mirrors many of my opinions clearly in how too many people these days hide behind the technologies available (such as spell checkers) and argue that knowing how to use a language properly is unimportant these days. They will invariably argue that  ‘it is what  you say not how you say it that is important in business today’ but although there are certainly growing numbers of people who cannot spell or use grammar correctly in the world today, these people tend not to dominate the business world. If you don’t want other people to think you are ignorant or uneducated, then just a little care on spelling or grammar can give you that little push ahead of the apathetic rest.

That said, I can’t really do the article justice, so I suggest you read it as the author puts his point across excellently and with obvious passion. It is plain the author does not sit on the fence on this one. NWjobs

There are a million and one different language courses out there for a hundred and one different languages; some are a lot better than others, but with quality often comes a heftier price tag.

The top of the range language products (as reviewed on the Lingualogue

website…excuse the plug) are undoubtedly worth the seemingly exorbitant charge, as the work and time that has gone into producing these titles is plainly obvious…and they work.

It doesn’t help knowing the price is justified, however, if you just can’t afford it, and let’s face it $300 is no small chunk of change. Although sometimes I may suggest that making a painful initial outlay for language learning courses is likely to give you extra incentive to finish the course rather than lose interest after 5 minutes, obviously one man’s painful initial outlay is another man’s bankruptcy and starvation.

There is of course a solution, and a legal one at that. A solution that has been around for years, a solution that was probably made more use of by your granny than any of us. This solution is of course the library, that archaic institution of mouldy books and even mustier bookshelves. This is probably how most people remember libraries from their school days–a place to find antiquated historical references, the entire collection of ELO,  and old Stephen King novels–certainly not any modern language learning courses.

Libraries however have changed, not just a little, but a huge paradigm shift. Of course I am sure you will still find reference books, and Stephen King books, and may even be able to pick up the ELO collection (if you really wanted) but libraries today have lurched into the technological age with great enthusiasm (well most at least).  It’s all computers and online material now, and yet they still have many things available to borrow without charge. One of those things, invariably, is language learning suites. At many libraries these days you can pick up copies of the top of the range language learning courses such as Rosetta Stone and TellMeMore. Some even have the excellent Fluenz. Many languages are available and all to borrow for the globally appreciated price of nowt, zilch, nada…absolutely nothing.

If you have a library near you and you are looking to learn a language, I suggest you get yourself down there straight away, get yourself a library card (remember those) and check out what they have available to help you learn that language.

Just remember, just because you haven’t splashed out an inordinate amount of cash for the privilege of learning the language, doesn’t mean you have to give up at the first hurdle.

Get yourself a library card and start learning.

Independent Travel

Most people who have been abroad or at least come into contact with a ‘foreigner’ will agree that travelling to a foreign country is a good way to learn a language–providing of course that the language is spoken in the destination of choice. I would go one step further, putting my neck on an admittedly not very risky block, and say that it is an excellent way to learn a language. This of course comes rolled with an obligatory caveat: One – it is only as effective as you make it, and two – it is only truly effective if you go alone.

The first is fairly self-explanatory and states the starkly obvious point that if you don’t try, you won’t learn anything. The second, however, could be a touch more contentious. Bear with me for a moment though, I will try my best to explain.

Going on holiday to most people is an ideal way to relax and get away from the hum drum daily routines of  work,  and share some undisturbed, stress free,  quality time with family or friends.  I couldn’t agree more with this sentiment (well I wrote it) and look forward to my time at the beach as much as the next man. This is great for relaxation, but it won’t help you learn a language.

The problem with travelling with friends or family is familiarity (well duh I hear you cry).  The vast majority of people stick to what they know when it is available, and while spending all of your vacation time with a loved one may do wonders for your relationship, it will play havoc with your language learning. Sure you will probably pick up the everyday  phrases and may even get taught how to order a beer, or ask for the bill, but you are unlikely to spend a lot of time chatting to people who don’t speak much English, and this is where the best language lessons are found. It is possible to glean a few sentences from the amiable bell boy, or the gregarious motorbike rental girl, but the fact is they  probably just as likely want to practice their English, and the language return will be minimal. In a group you are just not going to meet the right people.

The trick is to travel alone. Of course it has its drawbacks and can be slightly more dangerous if you approach it naively, but it is infinitely better for your language learning, and a whole lot more rewarding to boot. The key to it is a distinct lack of familiarity…anywhere. Sure this is disconcerting to begin with and if any first timer tells you he is not nervous he is a big fat liar (I certainly was…nervous that is). This lack of familiarity gives you the freedom to meet new people, strike up new friendships, and spend hours on end conversing with people with whom you have no mutual understanding whatsoever.  This is a lot more fun than it sounds I promise, and is a total immersion of both language and culture that you will never find anywhere else–not in a language course, not on the internet, and not even on holiday with your family. Sure you may need to brush up on the grammar when you get home, but this fumbling about with cobbled together sentences to make your self understood will give you a foundation of the language, a confidence, and a love for the language and culture of the country, that will never leave you.

If you feel that backpacking or travelling around the world all on your tod sounds  a little too ‘new age’ for your liking, there are plenty of companies  these days, like Cactus Languages, that will arrange a holiday and everything that goes with it for you, making the whole ‘holiday alone’ thing a little less daunting. They also include daily language lessons, which are a great way to get the grammar straight while you are there instead of waiting until you get home. The same point still applies though: If you spend the money, the time, and the effort to book a language learning holiday in a foreign country, don’t team up with the first English speaking guy that you bump into. Sure it’s tempting, and a hell of a lot easier. You may even strike up a valuable friendship. But you will most certainly miss out on those valuable and unforgettable language learning experiences.

After all, isn’t that why you are there?